Saturday, December 31, 2016

New Year Party 2016 at the apartment's common 5th floor.
I only managed to get some pieces of melon and a piece of banana.

 Karpal Singh drive on 1st January Sunday night.
 Just outside the McDonalds.

 There were a lot of families taking leisurely walks.

Thursday, December 29, 2016

Published by Tang Ruxyn
A man, known as Lee Hui Sen, willingly gave up his hard-earned RM44,500 for a family that he has probably not even seen in person.

He had forked out the large sum of money as a down payment for a house that was on auction, but decided to cease his wishes to buy the house when he noticed the family’s plight just as he went to check out the property.

Though he liked the house, he did not have the heart to kick out a family in distress from their home.

His handwritten letter which was left at the house's mailbox, moved many people and it's easy to see why:
"Dear sir, I am Lee Hui Sen, the man who bought your house that was being auctioned.

I apologise because I had bought the house and that may have caused you and your family members to fret and worry about this matter.

That day, my family had gone to the house, sir, and we have seen the children's clothes outside the house. My family and I do not have the heart to chase you out of the house, if after we bought the house, sir.

We decided not to buy the house after all, even when we’ve gone through all the trouble to pay RM44,500.

We will lose the money, but the money will still go into your house’s bank account. We hope this can be of some assistance to you."

He went on to offer some advice, hoping that the family would work towards getting a closure after this ordeal
"Try to negotiate with the bank. Restructure your loan, otherwise, your house would be auctioned again.

Try to discuss with your bank to lengthen the instalment plan, so that the monthly instalment could be lessened according to your capabilities to repay.

Dear sir, this is only my personal advice. If you can, please do throw away the small trees and flower pots at the side of your house so that your house would look brighter and invite positive energy into the home.

Good luck and have a nice living forever to you and your family."

Ananti Rajasingam, social worker


KUALA LUMPUR — Nothing makes Ananti Rajasingam happier than knowing that what she does helps children — local, immigrant or refugees — feel like they have a “normal” life, just like everyone else.

Working as a social worker at Yayasan Chow Kit, a centre that provides temporary shelter and education for at-risk children, Ananti and her colleagues do their best to help traumatised children reintegrate into mainstream society.

The job can be taxing both emotionally and mentally. Dealing with tales of abuse or hopelessness on a daily basis, Ananti admitted to breaking down a few times.

But knowing that some of the children she’s helped succeeded in life, and at the same time mindful of her own privilege, Ananti reminds herself that being strong is necessary to help those children survive their ordeals.

In her own words:

When I started out… I was known as a kafir (infidel) here. The children never touched me so I used to work like an island but I’ve always believed that children do not think this way…  it’s the adults who shape them.

The children were curious, they asked me about my faith.. at that time I didn’t know what was kafir. I was like why did they keep calling me kafir, but then I learned that it means someone who worships more than one god.. I didn’t take it to heart. I know that some things are just cultural and that I too have to learn (about their way of thinking).

Most of the children in the Chow Kit area, everything is a challenge to them. I come from a middle class family, I don’t have to sleep on the floor… I never have to worry about what my parents do. But the children living in Chow Kit, they have to think like survivors. And every day is survival for them — they’ve gone through so much in life.

There was once this foreign worker who died because he got electrocuted and everyone gathered around him. The children just came up to me and asked why are you so stressed up, it’s just someone dead. To them this was normal, death was normal. They deal with death every day because a lot of parents commit suicide in Chow Kit because of Ah Long problems.

It’s just really nice to see (these) children live in contentment. They carry so much burden at that age. A lot of them know about their parents’ hardship, and to carry that kind of weight (on your shoulders), you’re not really being a child.

I used to make a lot of decisions for people; like your life is like this, why not you do things this way. I think with maturity that people have their own answers. All you need to do is just dish out those options and let them reflect about it and they will have their answers. Don’t make decisions for other people.

Personally I feel a lot of people are trying to shut the issues (of refugees) out or they pretend it does not exist. They don’t see that refugees and refugee children are human beings as well.. imagine if the tables are turned and we become the refugees, nobody wants to go out there in a new world. You’d want to stay home no matter what… but people here think refugees are a problem.

It’s so emotional to hear their stories because they are so desperate… for others (locals) there are help, they have financial support, someone will always reach out to you if you’re local. But for refugees… it’s just frustrating. These are people with dignity, like doctors or people with good jobs and they’ve left everything. Imagine they come to you and ask if they can sweep the floor in exchange for some form of (help).

I’ve heard how they’ve been raped or molested, even by the authorities. Even though they have the UN (United Nations High Commission for Refugees) card, it gets thrown away. There was this lady who was pregnant… the most human thing you can think of is to give her some help but what they did was they detained her and when she wanted to pass motion, they told her to do it in front of other men. That is like the lowest point of a woman’s life, sort of stripping off whatever dignity she has.

We live in a narcissistic society… I always make it a conscious effort to tell myself this is something I have to do, like a purpose to do something kind and contribute back to something more positive.

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Monday, December 26, 2016

Christmas at Batu Ferringhi BnB

Cosme McMoon : I am a serious pianist. I have ambitions.
St Clair Bayfield: Oh, you think I didn't have ambitions? I was a good actor. But I was never to be a great actor. It was very very hard to admit that to myself. But once I had, I felt free of the tyranny of ambition. I started to live.
Is not ours a happy world, Cosme? Do we not have fun?
Cosme McMoon: Please, Mr. Bayfield.
St Clair Bayfield: You see we have to help her, because without loyalty there’s nothing.
Cosme McMoon: We’ll be murdered out there!
St Clair Bayfield: And you think I’m not aware of that? For twenty-five years I’ve kept the mockers and scoffers at bay. I’m very well aware of what they might do, but Florence has been my life, I love her, and I think you love her too. Hm? Singing at Carnegie Hall is her dream and I’m going to give it to her. The only question now is whether you will stand by your patron and friend in her hour of need, or whether you will focus on your ambition?
[Cosme doesn’t reply]
St Clair Bayfield: Please, Cosme. Will you play for your friend?

From the movie Florence Foster Jenkins.

Sunday, December 25, 2016

10 Daily Encouragements for the Person in Mental Illness Recovery

By Kalie Menge

As I’ve gone through this journey of struggling with demons and slowly, inching my way toward recovery, there are a few encouragements I’ve picked up along the way that have helped me. I hope, by sharing them, they will help you, too.

1. You are not alone.

Whatever you’re feeling, whatever you’re going through, be it stress, anxiety, depression, post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) or any issue. You are not the only one struggling with it. I promise. There are people who love you, care about you and want you to live and get better. I am one of them.

2. Your track record of getting through bad days is 100 percent.

You can get through today. And guess what? You can get through tomorrow, too.

3. The day is only 24 hours.

That thought has gotten me through so many days, especially when I wake up depressed or anxious. It gets to the point where I’m literally counting down the hours and minutes until I can crawl back in bed and start a new day. 24 hours. You can do this.

4. Following that: Tomorrow is a brand new day.

Yes, it might feel like the same crap that you dealt with yesterday, but it is still a brand freaking new day. A new day to have an adventure, to smile more, to find another tool to help, to be a bit more or less productive than yesterday. It’s a new chance. It’s up to you what you decide to do with it and whether or not you decide to take the chance and do something new.

5. You are brave, strong, courageous and a damn fine warrior!

You have been fighting your demons for what seems like forever. Some of you have been fighting for decades. Think about that! You have been fighting for years and haven’t given up or given in yet. Bravo! You are strong, much stronger than you thought you were, before this war began. You have fought every day, and you will continue to fight every day until you have won. That, my dears, is incredible bravery.

6. Your struggle does not define you.

Yes, your demons have a rather large impact on your life. Yet, I don’t say, “I’m Kalie, I’m depressed.” No, I say, “I’m Kalie, I have depression.” See the difference? Your demons, your struggle, your war does not take away from the awesome, amazing, wonderful, incredible person who you were before the war and who you are now! It is something you deal with, but it does not define you.

7. It will get better.

I know it’s hard to believe, when you’re stuck down in the crap, the muck, the pain and the dark, that it will get better. I promise you this, it will. Your present situation is not your final destination. You are heading toward something a million times better than what you are going through right now. Diamonds have to go through intense heat and intense pressure to be made. Just think, when you’re going through an extremely rough time that you’re becoming a diamond.

8. You are not perfect.

I know right now you’re probably thinking, “How is that an encouragement?” Well, that’s because no one is perfect, so you’re in great company! Martin Luther King Jr wasn’t perfect. David Bowie wasn’t perfect. Robin Williams wasn’t perfect. Alan Rickman wasn’t perfect. I am far from perfect. The President isn’t perfect, nor is the King or Queen. There is not one single solitary person who is perfect in the entire earth. So, please do not think you have to be perfect because you don’t. I know that with the demons lying and screaming at you, you feel far from perfect. And you know what? That’s perfectly OK. No one is asking you to be perfect. Well, I’m not at any rate, nor are your brothers and sisters who are fighting alongside you. You don’t have to be perfect. I promise.

9. Count your blessings.

Honestly, that helps. Your only blessing may be that you’re alive, but that in itself is indeed a blessing! Your blessings may include a roof over your head, clothes on your back, food in your belly, a warm bed, shoes on your feet and running water. They may include a family who is taking you in, a friend who checks in on you every single day, your therapy animal, your children or your husband or wife. You have blessings all around you. All you have to do is look, and they will appear.

10. You are going through this for a reason.

I don’t know what that reason is, and trust me, I would give anything to know why we are struggling and fighting. However, there is a reason. Maybe the reason is to help you cultivate your inner strength. Maybe it’s to show you that even though you may not love yourself, you are loved by many others. Maybe it’s to teach you to train your mind to think of positive things. Maybe it’s to show you that when you reach rock bottom, you can pick yourself back up. Maybe it’s to help you get in touch with yourself and to help you figure out who and what you really are. I don’t know. However, I do know no one struggles alone, and no one struggles for no reason. There is purpose in the struggle, and if you really, really look for it, there may even be peace.

Stay strong, dear ones.
Taken from Tim Ferris, author of Tools of Titans.

“The key is building fires where you can warm yourself as you wait for the tempest to pass.”

Another strategy revisits the importance of mind-body integration:
Go to the gym and move for at least 30 minutes. For me, this is 80% of the battle.

But his most powerful technique has to do not with the self but with other selves — or, rather, with mooring the self to the existence of goodness by modeling and extending it to others:

If you can’t seem to make yourself happy, do little things to make other people happy. This is a very effective magic trick. Focus on others instead of yourself. Buy coffee for the person behind you in line (I do this a lot), compliment a stranger, volunteer at a soup kitchen, help a classroom on, buy a round of drinks for the line cooks and servers at your favorite restaurant, etc. The little things have a big emotional payback, and guess what? Chances are, at least one person you make smile is on the front lines with you, quietly battling something nearly identical.

Wednesday, December 21, 2016

L, my ex-co worker in the PJ state contacted me to let me know that my old job is vacant. She encouraged me to try.
Her efforts in messaging me was surprisingly mysterious because we were never friends to begin with.
Acquaintances the most.

I do regret my decision coming here to Penang.
If I could turn back time, I wouldn't have left my old job, the one which I was so stable in, to come here, an entirely different risky experience, which had caused several relapses of depression.
My current weight gain truly depresses me.
I'm back to square one.

I pulled out an old shirt that was handed down by my sister.
It has a very strong fabric softener smell.
My sense of smell very quickly and succinctly reminded me of how I felt when I came to visit my sis here 3 years ago.
That sense of clarity.
I had that clear sense of clarity.

I can't go back.
I have no home back there.
I have only two choices.

A more familiar and comfortable misery back home ;
or risk creating  my own new misery and smudges of happiness here.

Monday, December 12, 2016

I'm reading about these news.
Thong Wei Yuan, who decided to end her life ;a 22-year-old ACCA student who leapt from the twelfth floor. Some time between 6 to 7 a.m, Nov 12 2015.
A witness shared, "she was prepared, having put on black clothing and footwear, she never uttered a sound when she was falling,so you can imagine the dreadful state of mind she was in, being overwhelmed with unbearable inner pain. It was chilling to see her fall without moving at all, motionless., "
2.Taken from The Star
Another story about postgraduate student Law Jia Yi,  who was said by her friends and the press to have committed suicide in Taiwan, be­­lieves everything would have been different if she had not gone there.
Reeling in shock from the news, the friend, who only wanted to be known as Keith, said he believed that she might have been suffering from depression.

The 24-year-old, a first-year postgraduate student at the National Taiwan Normal University, was found dead near some burnt charcoal in her room by a housemate on Wednesday evening, according to Taiwan newspapers.

Taiwan newspapers, quoting friends of Law, said she had been working part time at a cafe while studying to be a teacher there and that she claimed to be “under pressure”.
“She was a very cheerful, happy person. A very nice girl, she liked to bring happiness to people around her.
“But she liked to hide her own personal things to herself.
“To be honest, I really don’t know what happened in her last few days,” said Keith.

3.A piece of news dated Mar 06, 2009, A 27-YEAR-OLD Singapore Armed Forces (SAF) doctor, absent without official leave since last October, has been found dead in Melbourne.
The body of Captain (Dr) Allan Ooi was found under the Westgate Bridge in the south Australian city.

The 2,600m long bridge across the Yarra River is a vital link between the city centre and Melbourne's western suburbs.
A police spokesman there said the young man was seen getting out of his car on the bridge before 4am that day, and that the police did not believe anyone else was involved in the incident.
Capt (Dr) Ooi was believed to have been in Melbourne all this while, though it is not known where in the city he was, nor with whom he was staying.

He studied in Anglo-Chinese School (Independent) and Anglo-Chinese Junior College before reading medicine at the National University of Singapore.
He came from a family of doctors: His father Alex Ooi is an obstetrician and gynaecologist, his mother Lucy Ooi is a cosmetic surgeon and his brother Adrian, 28, is also a doctor.
His sister Lynette, 24, is the exception. She is a lawyer in Hong Kong.

Chiang Ti Ming (Born in Seremban - 1976) : Malaysian Chinese boy genius.  IQ exceeded 180.
-  13 years old; youngest student to be ever admitted to California Institute of Technology (CALTECH) to study physics.  His father accompanied him to California and live there to look after him.-  Well respected by his fellow classmates and lots of achievements, awards, results were in the top 5%.-   Graduated with a Doctorate in Particle Physics from Cornell University in New York.

Started working in US, and then suddenly in 2002 when he was 26 years old, local newspapers reported that he was admitted to hospital here for depression and withdrawal symptoms.  The whole nation was so awed by him when he first came into the limelight at 12 years old.  It seems that he does not talk and  just sleeps in his bed all day.

On January 6, 2007 (31 years old)  he passed away.  So sad and the family is too distraught  to say anything.  Their 4-year old daughter who was also said to be a genius had drowned in a swimming pool at the Seremban International Golf club in 1993. (Ti Ming was about 17 years old then.)  Double tragedy.

Sunday, December 11, 2016

THE original Thai Mango Sticky Rice dessert from HatYai.
Gift from housemate.

Monday, December 05, 2016

GEORGE TOWN, Dec 5 — Three clowns led the final send off for shooting victim, Choi Hon Ming, in a funeral procession complete with juggling and tricks today.

The clowns, all friends of Choi who was an entertainer and clown known as En Dao The Clown (En Dao is Hokkien for handsome), juggled and did small tricks as the sombre procession head towards the crematorium in Batu Gantung here.

Choi, 32, was killed by a stray bullet last Thursday during a shooting incident at the Tun Dr Lim Chong Eu Expressway where two others were killed and five were injured.

At the start of the procession, colourful balloons were released into the air.

Kuala Lumpur Clown Alley (KLCA) president D. Ravindran also delivered a speech, detailing his memories of Choi.

“He was a good entertainer and very skilled in balloon sculptures. I can’t believe he’s gone,” he said.

He later told reporters that the industry lost a great clown and entertainer with the passing of Choi.

On Thursday, a bodyguard allegedly went on a rampage and fired shots at his employer, Datuk Ong Teik Kwang and another bodyguard at the scene.

Ong was killed in the incident and another passer-by killed was Senthil Murugiah, 38.

The five others injured are Lee Hong Boon, 56, Nurul Huda Aziz, 38, Arivarni Krishnan, 33, Lim Boon Leng, 32, and RTM cameraman Mohamad Amirul Amin Mohamed Amer, 28

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