my lost

A friend shared with me about his lost of a sibling.
As we share that moment, I recall about my own lost.
Although my siblings are still alive, I have lost them.
You see, our family circumstances had ruined everything.

I'm sure you'd agree with me, that there are situations where we just can't be ourselves. In other words, we 'd kill our true self to be someone we are not.
The reasons vary,- survival, retaliation, or just simply the 'outcome' of our environment.

My brother and sis were not the siblings I remember them to be back when I was a kid.
I mean, even with blurred childhood memory, I know for certain that they were 'better' people.

Many many times I had wondered how we all had turned out if we were brought up by a different set of parents.

How our talents wouldn't have been wasted.

How we could be loved and learn to love.

How we'd be happier.