This is from PostSecret.

"I wish that the happiness of others will always be enough to outweigh the miseries of my own life."


such a kind message from a person who have lived a cruel life.

Matthew 6:27-"See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. - Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these.-If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you—you of little faith?-For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. -But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.-Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."

It's not sympathy nor understanding nor support nor approval I'm after.
Or maybe it's simply because I haven't got anyone to offer some to me.

I'm worried.
=(

I just sat up and stared.
Minutes passed.
I dragged myself out of bed.

I'm lost.
I don't know where I'm heading.
I don't know what I want.
I don't know what's my issue.

..........I don't know.
I simply don't know.

My colleague accidentally opened one of my personal files in my thumbdrive.

A visit from the past.

"God, please close it."
He was also surprised at my reaction.

Apparently the wound hasn't heal.

I kept yelling at him to let the string roll each time there is wind, or not all his effort in running will go in vain.

But did he listen?
No...
He just ran and ran. But he enjoyed running so much.
He didn't seem to mind that his kite didn't reach higher.
I think he's happy just the way it is.

His running didn't go in vain.

I took this photo in a SPCA charity fair.
Pets were put up for adoption.
Most of them responded well to the strangers.
But this...
perhaps he was just too tired?fed up?
........................of hoping?

He resonated me with a great sense of familiarity.
That's why I took this photo.

"Yeah, sure. It's in my bag."

I could hear my brother searching, as I closed my eyes hoping to fall asleep ASAP.
The sound of him scrambling in the bag keep on and I had to interrupt my own sleep to check on him.


He was searching my sister's bag.
"Ko, that's jie's bag. Mine is on MY chair."

I can't believe my own brother can't distinguish my working bag from my sis's.
The bags which we faithfully carry to and from work EVERYDAY.
Mine is rectangularly BLACK.
Hers is squarish light green.


MEN.

He leaned on my shoulder.
I was pleasantly surprised by this comfortable public display of affection.
Then, he began to rub his head on my shoulder, as if I don't already notice his affection.
He got bolder and squeezed his hand on mine, then stroking my arm.

I was a bit nervous.
I never saw this coming.
We were never this 'close'.

After awhile, he hugged me.
I was taken aback, but I didn't push him away.
He got EVEN bolder and began to caress my breast.
I quickly slapped his hand.
"Woi!"
I clicked my tongue out loud to make sure he gets the message that that action is forbidden.
He looked at me confusedly.
And he ran to his mummy.
Mummy embarrassingly carried him.

Sigh...
He's barely 2 years old.
Too curious Too Soon.

My friend canceled on me, so I’m left there all by myself. I’m the type (dying breed) who honors appointment and make the effort to be early, so that I don risk being late.
That’s how I was left all alone in Ss2 at 11.15a.m

Worst part? They stop serving breakfast meals at 11a.m SHARP.

So, there I was sitting at the first floor, chomping down fries and McChicken, looking out the window…

Staring at the people who are walking alone, walking with family, walking with friends… cars driving by, cars getting into parking, getting out of parking…

....My thoughts just strayed...

Then, I looked at the time.

1 hour had passed.

My unbitten parts of McChicken was cold.

Threw every food on the table in my mouth and washed my hands before I headed for exit.

–If only I could do the same with the things that went through my head

Was seated on the opposite side of the building, waiting for the rain to miraculously stop.
Noticed the man on the left waiting for the bus alone, seemingly oblivious to the danger being under the tree.
The lady on right joined his quest minutes later.

Poetic took this...

WHAT? He is a graphic designer?

Hell... NO.....
Damn.

What a shame, coz I thought he's nice.

Was in ktm, (those who take ktm in KlangValley would know it's a nightmare).

Pushed to the side, once again to the advantage of the male commuters (I admit, some of whom are UNwilling as well)

Then, I noticed two African passengers... one of whom were playing his Mp3 music on speaker and he was 'moving' along with the rhythm.
He played a couple of songs, but his favourite was obviously the one back in his homeland.
I regret to say, I don't know what genre to place that piece of song.
Although I don't understand a word, it DOES sound nice.

Plus, the oblivious, unperturbed, don't-give-a-damn-what-you-think African brother is doing a great job 'moving' 'swaying' very APPRECIATIVELY to the song....
what is there NOT to like?

...after some reflections of my life...
this quote came to mind,

"Men have constantly made my life difficult,

women had consistently made my life miserable..."

believe me,,, this looked much better from my mobile phone.

this was taken just before the storm, just before the petrol hike havoc...

I wish I have something really intellectual / deep to say ...

Nah,, just let the picture speak its thousand words for me?

Edited from http://lebigeasy.blogspot.com/2008/06/choice-or-chance.html

Choice or Chance

When you meet someone
you're attracted to, that's not a choice. That's chance.
When we meet the right person to love, when we're at the right
place at the right time, that's chance.

The difference is what happens afterwards. When will you take
that infatuation, that crush, that mind-blowing attraction to the
next level? That's when all sanity goes back, you sit down and
contemplate whether you want to make this into a concrete
relationship or just a fling.

If you decide to love a person, even with his or her faults,
-that's not a chance. That's choice.
When you choose to be with a person, no matter what, that's choice.
Even if you know there are many
people out there who are more attractive, smarter, and richer than your
mate, and yet, you decide to love your mate just the same,
that's choice.


"Fate brings you together, but it's still up to you to make it happen."
We may meet our soul mates by chance, but loving and staying with our soul mate is still a choice we have to make.

We came to the world not by finding someone perfect to love,

BUT to learn how to love an imperfect person perfectly.

~Author Unknown~

So many times, memories of us, I ponder
Was there ever a time we thought of each other?
Would it be the same reflection?
Or simply a composed deception?

Even for the briefest moment,
If ever you were truly mine
Was it just another common,
That will soon pass in time?
How could something so harmless,
Caused US to end so careless?

I can’t seem to let it go,
And yet I’m forced to say no.
How could I have done it better?
Foolish, as it no longer matter.
Can you believe I still stare?
Can you believe I still care?

Should ever our paths meet,
I wish to see a lady so sweet,
In your arms, laughing together,
You, being blissfully happier.

Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning.

-Rick Cook, The Wizardry Compiled

"If you say yes, only we do it. If you don't want to, we don't. Simple as that. I never like to force."

- I do want, but...it's just...

"It's your first time?"

I looked down, blushed and nodded. I couldn't hide the shyness from him.

"Not now then when?"

He was getting impatient. I could understand his frustration. But I couldn't explain myself. Words escaped me.

"What do you want from me? Why are you here?"

-I just want to let you know that I'm ... still interested.

I noticed his devilish curled lips.

"Look, if you have doubts in me, you can always go to someone else. I always have someone else too."

-No,no. It's not you. It's me... I have doubt with myself...

"Then, I can't help you. Why don't you go watch a movie instead? I have other things better to do, ok?"

He raised his hands in the air as a sign of retreat from the conversation.
I could only nod like a child.
I walked away feeling really confused as to how I had upset him.

Recollecting the entire dialogue above, I smiled to myself.
It's too amusing. I must write about it.

The above dialogue was between myself and a tattooist.